China- Culture shock much?!?!?!

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I just spent 30 long days in China and even though I have traveled to many countries I think China in particular was a huge shock for me. I had a hard time adjusting to their culture because it is not only hugely different from mine but it actually goes so against my believes and the way I think people should behave.

I am not writing this to offend the Chinese culture, I get that we are different and that’s why I love traveling and seeing the differences between cultures and the way people behave. Writing my impression is just the way I processed what was going on for me.

From my month in China I created my “Only in China” list (some of the behaviors were seen in one person but most of them I saw across the country)

-People push others to get into a door!
They literally shove people! No one wants to wait, no one is willing to let people get out of the bus, or the metro, or a store. It’s horrible! As the respectful human being that I am, I am used to wait for people to get out of the metro and then get in… Not in China! As soon as the doors open people push and push and push to get in! How come they haven’t figured out that by waiting 10 seconds it would be a lot more pleasant to get into the train?!?!

- People pick their nose in public!
On my second day in China I saw a guy spend the whole metro ride picking his nose, literally putting half his finger in and then rolling his buggers and throwing them in the metro floor… really dude? That’s disgusting! And this wasn’t the only time, I saw it a lot! And what’s with the nail clipping in the metro or bus and leaving nails all over the ground?!?!

- People scream at each other!
On my second day I also saw a woman scream to her husband for at least 6 blocks, she screamed so loudly that everybody stopped and stared! She couldn’t wait to get home and scream there? The poor husband just kept walking faster, at least 5 meters away from her, she just kept screaming louder (I wish I could understand what was going on)

Anyway, for Chinese people the regular tone of voice is in screaming volume and on your face. Could this possibly be because they are so many and somehow need to be noticed or heard?!?!

-Boyfriends carry their girlfriend’s purse!
Mostly in Shanghai I saw this happening! It was hilarious to see all the men carrying purses and bags around town!

Apparently men have to “fight” to get a girl’s attention and they have to treat her like a princess! From male friends I learned that Chinese girls are mostly interested in how much money a guy makes, apparently there is a set amount of money that they guy has to spend on a girl per month! That is just absolutely crazy! On a first date a girl will ask a guy how much money he makes and focus on his finances!… Really?!?!

-People don’t like to queue…

and don’t respect those who do! At a very posh bar a Chinese woman in her 20s pretended to go in a line for the bathroom (line with all foreigner) and when a stall opened she ran into it and skipped everybody in line… All of us just looked at each other in disbelief!

- People freaking cut lines…

And others won't say a thing… It's infuriating! I saw people all ages cutting lines, from kids to teenagers, to middle age people, to fully grown adults! Zero respect for others that are waiting patiently! And when you make sure that they don't pass you they get angry! WTF?

I saw many parents encouraging their children to cut the lines, I saw many parents using their kids as a tool to advance lines!

At disneyland people kept cutting the line! If they don’t want to wait then they shouldn’t go to disneyland! Disneyland Shanghai is not the happiest place on earth… trust me!

- People spit… EVERYWHERE… ANY TIME!

This is the most horrible one yet… People cough up super loudly and spit phlegm anywhere: bathroom floor, metro floor, sidewalks. The coughing comes with a very loud throat sound, I think they are clearing up their throats but come on! Is it really necessary?!? I know there is tons of pollution but come on people! Mexico City has so much pollution and never ever did I see people spitting and making such a yucky sound! I am sorry to say this but it is disgusting!

- Kids pee and poo in the middle of the street!

This me the hardest: Kids have underwear with a cut in their crotches and will stop and pee or go #2 anywhere... even in the middle of a busy street! I saw this many many many times, at very touristy places, parents encourage the kids to just go on the floor. Are parents lazy? Is it just a convenience for them to have their kid pee and poo in the middle of a street with hundreds of people watching? The one that disturbed me the most was a kid pooping in a busy pedestrian street... right next to McDonalds! Because you know... it is so hard to walk through the door and go into a bathroom!

As a teacher and a person who has dedicated her life to make children’s life better I look at these behaviors in disbelief and think that this is at the base of the Chinese cultural problem. They are teaching children that this kind of behavior is ok, they are dismissing delayed gratification in the purest of form. For me it looks like this: "Oh! You need to go to the bathroom? Great, drop your pants right here and poop, contaminate the environment and have zero respect for others, you are first and your priorities, even the bathroom ones, can't be delayed!”

Really? They should be teaching their children to wait, to hold it... isn't life about that? Children grow up thinking that they are first, that their needs come before anybody else's and in adulthood this translates to people pushing others that are on their way (literally) to get somewhere first, to get in first... it's awful! There was no one day in china that I didn't think about their culture and wondered about my kind of world and how I want to influence others to make this world a better place. I decided to study Montessori because I love their principles and knowing that the base of this education is grace and courtesy. We teach children to be kind and gracious, we teach them that they need to be patient, we teach them that they need to do things carefully and purposely. In the Montessori classroom we only have one of each material in the class for a reason, to teach patience, to teach delayed gratification, for them to internalize the idea that a friend is using the material therefore they have to go and find something else to do. I could go on for ever and ever and ever but i should just stop!

- Trains take breaks!

Trains will take a 35 min break to smoke and get food in the middle of the journey… doesn’t it make more sense to get to the destination 35 minutes earlier?

- People eat wearing plastic gloves…

If they are eating finger food they wear funny plastic gloves! And chew very loudly with their mouth open! and they also talk while chewing!!!! (Ahhh! my skin scrawls!!!)

- People spit their food on the table!

When they are eating food with bones (meat or fish) they spit it out on the table! No, they do not have a separate dish to take the bone out of their mouth with their fingers or chop sticks and place it on a plate, they really spit it out!!! And leave such a mess on the table!

Once I was eating next to a Chinese guy who was spitting his fish bones really close to the eggplant I was eating… I bet I swallowed a little bit of his DNA! :(

-People are very messy eaters!

They not only spit out their food on the table, they also put on the table any garbage left, like shells, wrappings etc. Many times all their garbage is on the ground all around the table!
One time I saw a guy eat shelled peanuts at a train station and he had the shells all over him and all around the floor around him. When it was time to get into the train he just stood up, the shells on top of his pants fell on the floor and left the mess there! I was in disbelief!

- People love MSG!!!

As in Monosodium Glutamate! They add MSG to EVERYTHING to enhance the taste! Most street food carts have a bowl of it and sprinkle it on your food like we put sprinkles on a cupcake!

I eat sorta healthy and don’t add any salt to my food so Chinese food just tasted like a bowl of salt to me! It was so bad that after eating my mouth would become numb and I would get super duper thirsty! When I drank water it tasted sweet, just like after you have been snorkeling or diving for an hour and you get back to the boat and drink some water and it tastes so fresh… No way MSG is good for your body!

- People drive on the right side… wait… No!

They actually drive on the left side!!! … Whatever side of the street that is left that is! It doesn’t matter if the traffic goes left or right… They don’t care! They ride against traffic, with traffic, on the sidewalk, on pedestrian streets, on puddles, on grass, on absolutely anything! It’s crazy and one has to be extremely careful! Many streets have designated bike lanes and they still don’t care! The honking is extreme, they expect you to move out of the way when you are on a side walk! In China no matter where you walk you are never safe!

- Garbage is collected in front of restaurants!

The garbage man stops in front of the main door of a restaurant during dinner and the cooks come through the restaurant main dining area with huge buckets full of garbage! Haha that would be such a health violation in the US!

- People burp and don't say excuse me!

I sat with Chinese people at restaurants and they would burp big time and don’t say anything! It is really strange!

- People could care less about hygiene...

Really, they don't give a s***, literally speaking! They love their squat toilets but come on! They freaking need to work their aim game! They go #1 and #2 sometimes outside of designated area... oh my! I just gagged!

They never provide TP (sometimes not even in hostels) nor do they have soap… so you know nobody is washing hands properly!

The hygiene thing is not only bathrooms; like I mentioned before is picking their nose, burping, spitting on other people’s personal bubble etc etc etc

- People throw garbage out of the car window!

This happens in a lot of countries but in China is not only out of the window, is actually everywhere! If there are no garbage cans people think it is still ok to just drop it as they walk!

-People have poor work attitude!

The workers really don’t care! I find this to be true in cities more than out in the field (there everybody seems busy working on their land.) If you go to a store the workers don’t acknowledge you, they are always on their phone or sleeping! YES! SLEEPING!

I don’t understand their customer service… is it maybe because there are so many gazillions of people in China that workers know that if I don’t buy something it doesn’t really matter because 1000 more people will come after me? Or maybe they don’t want to deal with a foreigner?

- Workers at stores will follow you very closely.

So this is the only exception to my last point! At clothing stores the workers will follow you… VERY CLOSELY! It feels like they are making sure you won’t steal anything!
One day in Xi’an just for fun I started walking in circles with a lady following me… I had a good laugh!

- People have blank faces!
Really… Chinese people show no facial expressions! I spent a lot of time in busses, metros, trains, and the streets surrounded by millions of Chinese and the more I looked at them the more I realized that I had no clue how they felt!

I come from a Latin culture, I love to laugh, I smile more than I should, and you can tell what I am feeling by looking at my face. Not in China! Most people have a neutral facial expression! It’s incredible! Have they been taught to suppress their feelings? It is just so strange!

Twice I saw people look at pornographic content in public transportation and I had to look... not at the content but at their faces, at their expressions and figure out what was going on. Well, both people had ZERO facial expressions, I couldn't tell if they were having fun, were not liking it, were embarrassed... nothing! Zero, even when doing something in public transportation that could be disturbing to others!

-Young people are supposed to give seats in bus to older people.

I feel like the only time you have to be respectful is inside the bus when

you HAVE to stand up to give your seat to an "enderly." I get it, it's kind, it’s

the right thing to do but here any person with white hair is an elderly!

The person could be 40 with white hair and you must stand up! The worst

part is that like 80% of the population is old in this country! I mean, in a

6:30am bus I was the only person under the age of 50!

-People love to stare!

For a looooong time! With no shame!

I know I’m beautiful… but come on! Stop looking at me!

-People love selfies!!

This doesn’t need an explanation! It is selfie stick madness over here!

Oh! and they LOOOOVE selfies with flowers! It’s very funny!

Now that I just butchered the Chinese Culture I want to say that I respect it and after a month there I can barely start to understand why things are the way they are in China. The more I traveled around the country the more I got to like Chinese people! The younger generation I believe is aware of many of the things that I just wrote about and I was able to talk to them about my impressions and what I didn’t like about China. I found it to be a good cultural experience to be able to express my feelings about their culture with them. Most of the time I would see them squint when I brought up things like the spitting, the pushing, or the pooping on the street. I had many discussions about my observations about their lack of facial expression and it was nice to hear their point of view.

In all honesty I couldn’t have survived a month in China with zero knowledge of the language if it wasn’t for all the amazing Chinese people I met on my way. I am so grateful to all my new friends for translating for me, for writing things like “I am vegetarian” in a piece of paper for me to show around when looking for food, to all those people who were WeChat ready to help me at any time with anything! I had Chinese people send me voice messages to be played at different establishments, I even had people ask me to call them when I got to a place and they would talk to the staff so I could get what I wanted, how about sweet Thomas who called china unicom on my behalf?!?! Really… amazing people!

Although the language barrier was HUGE people still made an effort to communicate with me, many times it all ended at an exchange of smiles and me saying “No chinese.” On the buses people would stand up to give me a seat when I was carrying my bags, a guy even took my bag at a metro station and went up hundreds of stairs with it! Really sweet!
Many of my new friends asked me for patience, they said that the new Chinese generation is getting better but that they still have some work to do… I said I will be back in 50 years!

About Post Author

Andrea

Hi! It's me... Andrea! In 2016 I decided to drop everything and take a year to enrich my life and travel around the world. It turns out the world is just too big for 12 months! Still on the road and sharing my experience as a solo female traveler around the globe!

1 comment:

UnknownNovember 12, 2016 at 10:49 PM
It's nice to get a glimpse of china, although I'm sure there is so much more to learn. After hearing some of the differences between China and California or Mexico, I would never thought in a million years that there were people who live like this and r ok with it . I'm sure that even though u experience all these behaviors, u also picked some good ones. Keep searching and have fun